This webpage contains excerpts
of copyright protected material. All
rights are reserved.
Dorm Rooms to Boardrooms
ISBN : 0-9759665-0-2
Victoria Pilate
Crandell & Rose
of copyright protected material. All
rights are reserved.
Dorm Rooms to Boardrooms
ISBN : 0-9759665-0-2
Victoria Pilate
Crandell & Rose
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Dorm Rooms to
Boardrooms spans the full
transition from college to
the Real World, covering:
Interview Tips
Apartment Hunting
Office Politics
Getting Ahead
Etiquette
Business Travel Tips
Image and Style
Tips on Presentations
and more!
Boardrooms spans the full
transition from college to
the Real World, covering:
Interview Tips
Apartment Hunting
Office Politics
Getting Ahead
Etiquette
Business Travel Tips
Image and Style
Tips on Presentations
and more!
Companies surveyed in 2004 by
the National Association of
Colleges and Employers (NACE)
said they are most interested in
good communication skills. The
NACE survey also found honesty,
interpersonal skills, initiative, a
good work ethic, and team skills
(in that order) as important
characteristics.
the National Association of
Colleges and Employers (NACE)
said they are most interested in
good communication skills. The
NACE survey also found honesty,
interpersonal skills, initiative, a
good work ethic, and team skills
(in that order) as important
characteristics.
Cover Letter Tips
Avoid “Dear Sir/Ma’am” Salutations.
Customize for each job application.
Trifold resume and cover letter. Top fold
should be the top of letter and resume.
Demonstrate knowledge of company
and industry.
Briefly highlight background and
qualifications.
Avoid “Dear Sir/Ma’am” Salutations.
Customize for each job application.
Trifold resume and cover letter. Top fold
should be the top of letter and resume.
Demonstrate knowledge of company
and industry.
Briefly highlight background and
qualifications.
“I had an interview with a panel that
asked me questions rapid fire. It felt
like target practice and I was the
target. In a way they had to do that
because the office was one that
required people to think quickly and
on their feet. I knew from the type of
work they did it was survival of the
fittest and this was a test of how I
could survive.”
asked me questions rapid fire. It felt
like target practice and I was the
target. In a way they had to do that
because the office was one that
required people to think quickly and
on their feet. I knew from the type of
work they did it was survival of the
fittest and this was a test of how I
could survive.”
Joining Professional Organizations
At a career talk, a student asked me if
joining professional organizations
could help a career. I do not know of a
study that has found a relationship
between career advancement and
membership in a particular
organization or type of organization but
it makes intuitive sense. For one
thing, professional organizations are
avenues to networking.
There is also bad news. Some
membership fees of professional
organizations can be very pricey. For
one organization, I found annual
membership fees were nearly $100; it
gave a discount for new members for
the first year. A Business 2.0 magazine
article (July 2004) suggested sitting in
on a few nonmember events to test the
organization and its vitality; writer
Eileen Gunn suggested smaller
associations (under 100 members)
can be better because they offer a
variety of perspectives but at the same
time are small enough that you can get
to know and bond with other
members. If you’re lucky, your
employer may pick up the tab for some
membership fees to work-related
organizations.
At a career talk, a student asked me if
joining professional organizations
could help a career. I do not know of a
study that has found a relationship
between career advancement and
membership in a particular
organization or type of organization but
it makes intuitive sense. For one
thing, professional organizations are
avenues to networking.
There is also bad news. Some
membership fees of professional
organizations can be very pricey. For
one organization, I found annual
membership fees were nearly $100; it
gave a discount for new members for
the first year. A Business 2.0 magazine
article (July 2004) suggested sitting in
on a few nonmember events to test the
organization and its vitality; writer
Eileen Gunn suggested smaller
associations (under 100 members)
can be better because they offer a
variety of perspectives but at the same
time are small enough that you can get
to know and bond with other
members. If you’re lucky, your
employer may pick up the tab for some
membership fees to work-related
organizations.
Gym etiquette and good health
go hand in hand.
Always wipe off equipment. Cold
and flu viruses thrive on drinking
fountains, dumbbells and
equipment handles. Washing
your face and hands after every
workout is the advice of the
American Safety and Health
Institute.
go hand in hand.
Always wipe off equipment. Cold
and flu viruses thrive on drinking
fountains, dumbbells and
equipment handles. Washing
your face and hands after every
workout is the advice of the
American Safety and Health
Institute.
“Don’t criticize someone unless
you see a clear way that your
words are going to help him
improve.” Robert Baron, Ph.D.,
professor of management and
psychology at Rensselaer
Polytechnic institute, Men’s Health
interview (July/August 2003)
you see a clear way that your
words are going to help him
improve.” Robert Baron, Ph.D.,
professor of management and
psychology at Rensselaer
Polytechnic institute, Men’s Health
interview (July/August 2003)
Congratulating colleagues on major
accomplishments is important.
Who can forget the scene in A
Beautiful Mind when John Nash was
penned by his colleagues?
accomplishments is important.
Who can forget the scene in A
Beautiful Mind when John Nash was
penned by his colleagues?
Warning for Office Parties:
Two common choices on the office
party buffet, alcohol and sweets,
make an inebriating mix. Sugar
intensifies the punch of alcohol. In
effect, it decreases one’s threshold
for sobriety.
Two common choices on the office
party buffet, alcohol and sweets,
make an inebriating mix. Sugar
intensifies the punch of alcohol. In
effect, it decreases one’s threshold
for sobriety.
Thursdays are the best days for
office parties, especially any after
hours. People want their Fridays
and weekends for family events.
Avoid selecting dates near annual
events. Mother’s Day or high school
graduations are bound to cause
conflicts.
office parties, especially any after
hours. People want their Fridays
and weekends for family events.
Avoid selecting dates near annual
events. Mother’s Day or high school
graduations are bound to cause
conflicts.
This page is maintained by Victoria Pilate. Comments and suggestions can be sent to vpilate@victoriapilate.com. This page
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Excerpts from Dorm Rooms to Boardrooms
Job Hunting Hints
Author Buddy Hobart emphasizes the devil in the details of job
hunting, “The people who are successful at finding good jobs
straight out of college are usually the ones who understand the
importance of the little mail, the right suit, and polished shoes all
play a role in landing the interview and the position. In doing my
survey, I was shocked to see some of the email addresses of
respondents; anything of a sexual nature or even some hobbies
(doll_collctr, sexie_girl, babydoll, me_rudeboy, poopie_babe) as
email addresses can discredit you.
Watch Your Language on Interviews
Slang should never be used during an interview. “All else being
equal—experience, credentials, etc—in most cases the employer
will select the candidate with the better verbal skills,” says Laura
Lorber, managing editor of CareerJournal.com in a Black
Enterprise article.
A former colleague reported being a new hire with one or two
years of experience and interviewing at his alma mater. He
interviewed students whom he had known while he was a student
there. He was surprised that students were far too relaxed with
him during the interview. He didn’t expect them to ingratiate
themselves to him but he expected a more professional
interaction.
Though he wanted to give them a chance, he had a tough time
reconciling their interview behavior to what they would do on the
job. Could he fairly recommend John Doe for a job when John
couldn’t seem to use a word other than “Dude” or “sweet” in the
interview?
From my research, one student admitted to having made the
mistake of following the interviewer’s cue on using vulgarities.
That was a mistake. The interviewer apparently didn’t realize he
was using vulgarities and promptly suggested the student change
his language. Interviewers are critical of your speech and dress
but will give themselves latitude. It can be “do as I say but not as
I do” with vulgarities in interviews AND in the office. That’s a bad
habit to drop quickly!
Interruptions to Interview
If someone interrupts the interview, try to disengage yourself from
the conversation between the person and the interviewer. While
they are talking, avoid eye contact with them by surveying the
interviewer’s bookcase or his awards on the wall. By trying to
maintain eye contact with the interviewer while she’s dealing with
the person who came in may be interpreted as impatience.
What to Consider for an Apartment
Make a mental checklist of things to consider when choosing a
place to stay. You’ll be at a slight disadvantage in that you may
need to learn the pros and cons of a new city and its
neighborhoods (and its suburbs) as well as any quirky issues with
the various neighborhoods of your new city.
Luckily, crime statistics are down for the nation and for most
metropolitan areas. Unfortunately, crime is still very real. When
deciding where to live, you can get a handle on the safety of the
area by doing a few things. First, call the police district for the
area and ask for the crime statistics. Don’t be surprised by a
negative report on crime from the police like “That’s a bad
neighborhood.”
Even the White House is in a “bad neighborhood” using some
statistics. Ask the police for details like the numbers of muggings,
rapes, etc. A neighborhood with a string of car vandalisms isn’t
the same as one with a history of muggings and murders.
Be sure to visit a potential neighborhood at night and during the
day. Are there people standing around for no reason? How is
the street lighting? How clean are the streets compared to other
neighborhoods? Does it look like an area that families or young
adults are living?
You can also gauge a neighborhood by reading the crime reports
in the local paper. Metropolitan areas like Washington, D.C., and
Orlando have crime reports listed weekly in the paper.
Assuming you’ll be living in a city that has public transportation,
one of your selection criteria for a place to live should be public
transportation. If you’re going to drive to work, your residence
doesn’t have to be super close to a train or subway line. You
would probably only use public transportation when your car is in
the shop. If public transportation is to be a daily necessity, the
closer the better. In a city that has a large subway and bus
system, consider housing locations that are close to a line that
runs near your office. Where possible and affordable, shorten
your commute as best possible.
The best location to live is near services such as a grocery store,
drug store, medical facilities, shopping centers, movie theatres,
etc. Here again, give some thought to the what-ifs. If your car is
ever out of commission, closeness to a grocery store or drug
store becomes, using Murphy’s Law, exceedingly important.
Distance to other services like shopping centers and movie
theatres is a consideration; this is a secondary issue and only
comes into play when considering conveniences.
Common Activities for New Employees
As the new kid on the block, you’ll get the least glamorous
assignments and you may get those annual tasks that everyone
dislikes. You also may be asked to do semi-professional jobs
such as editing and proofreading the work of others. These are
all opportunities to shine.
At an old job, I was assigned to do the annual charity campaign
because as my boss put it, “It’s always assigned to the new
person.” It was a matter of getting materials and instructions for
the agency’s campaign coordinator then distributing and
collecting pledge cards. For my office, I had a “kick-off” with
coffee, tea and doughnuts, put up posters and made an email
appeal to staff. Then I did periodic email highlights of the
success stories, taken from the campaign materials that I had
been given. I ended the office’s campaign with a brief program to
present donor pins making finger sandwiches and light snacks.
It cost little out of my pocket to do, made a great impact on a
worthy cause (the office had 100 percent participation and three
recipients of the donor award) and scored some career
enhancing points. Imagine the difference if I had done the task
grudgingly and resentfully at being singled out as the new hire to
do an undesirable task.
As a new employee with a fair amount of free or at least flexible
time, you may be asked to proofread or error check documents
or figures. Proofreading is more important than you think. A typo
or misplaced comma can cost money in a contract dispute or can
cost your employer a valuable client.
If you do proofread, learn common proofreading notations and be
careful with your proofing notes. I once got a document back that
someone had proofread. He used a pencil and small writing. It
was very hard to see his edits; it took extra time to go over his
pages carefully so as not to miss anything.
Also, you may have many manuals to read. Here’s where you
shouldn’t skimp. Read any manuals that you’re given. These will
come in handy very shortly. Your coworkers will know rules and
procedures back and forth. Once you’re at full speed, there will
be no exam on how well you know the rules. You’ll be expected to
work at a high level of competence within the boundaries
established by your employer’s rule book. It may be boring but it
is necessary. Take notes. It helps to stay awake.
Mentors
The Society of Human Resource Management found 25 percent
of employers have formal mentor programs. Such programs are
designed to help new employees blend in and learn the ropes.
However, University of Georgia professor Lillian Eby found that
54 percent of mentees had negative mentoring experiences.
Instead of benefiting their careers, some found the experience
harmful. The reasons were varied but had a common theme; the
mentor often expected the mentee to follow his advice without
exception or the mentor expected the mentee to be a carbon
copy of herself. Occasionally, the relationship sours because of
lack of confidentiality.
Professionals suggest not having mentor in chain of command of
one’s immediate office. Rather seek one or ask to be placed with
one in an office that interests you or had a potential for strategic
alliances. Some career counselors suggest having more than
one mentor, one for each skill area on which you want to develop.
Frankly, though that sounds good, I believe it would be difficult in
practice to find more than one or two mentors.
If the mentor program does not have guidelines for it, be sure to
inquire about confidentiality and frequency of meetings. One
career writer suggested that, if the relationship involved goal
setting, the mentor and mentee should discuss early on
accountability.
Mentors can help with career advice and decoding office politics.
They can also help with making vital connections to others whose
cooperation you may need. They can even provide vital office
“gossip” – informal information about coworkers that is needed to
interact successfully.
Likewise, think about how you approach the mentoring
relationship. As one career writer noted, the mentee tends to
treat the relationship as temporary or ad hoc, going to the mentor
about a particular problem then disappearing. The goal for both
parties should be long term development. However, some mentor
programs like Intel’s have an established duration of a few
months, often six to nine months. The two can continue the
relationship informally.
You should not expect a counseling session or extensive career
advice from mentors. Rather, their role should be one of being a
springboard for you to bounce ideas or to point you in the right
direction. You should also be open for criticism. Above all, know
that your career is not your mentor’s responsibility.
Small Talk
In any social or professional setting, you will need to make small
talk with others. If you don’t know the person, you could easily
struggle though a few awkward minutes. If you ask the wrong
question, your struggle could be even worse.
There are a few things you should never ask people at work.
Never ask when a person plans to start a family. Many people
struggle with infertility privately or their decision to have or not
have children is highly personal. Six million Americans struggle
with infertility. An infertile woman can be highly sensitive to the
topic of children. I almost never ask about children unless I see
pictures in the person’s office.
My favorite interaction advice of etiquette guru Hilda Klinkenberg
is on taboo small talk topics. In the Working Woman article, she
advised against diets, personal health, personal tragedies and
the cost of anything not work related. She also advised against
asking for free professional advice such as asking a
dermatologist to look a mole on your arm. I’d add to that list
smoking; some smokers are extremely sensitive to suggestions to
quit or comments about their health, even in a joking manner.
Never comment to a person about their height or other personal
characteristic. That’s an insult. This includes asking about
scars. Comments like “Did you play basketball?” can grow weary
on a tall person.
Safe topics are the weather, job related developments, local arts
festivals, or major sporting events. Stay away from news events
that could be construed as political or are controversial.
Style Tips for Interviews
The key to dressing for interviews is professionalism and
neutrality. Even if the company has an every day casual dress
policy, the expectation at interviews is business attire. For
women, that generally means suits with skirts and not pants
suits. For both men and women, dark suits in solids or pinstripes
generally are expected for interviews. For professional attire,
navy blue and black are universally stylish and conservative; dark
greys and some green shades are also stunningly professional.
You can add your own personal flares by using accessories
strategically.
Your accessories should be equally neutral and professional.
Interviewers will notice even the smallest detail of a ragged
friendship bracelet, scuffed shoes or wrinkled shirt under a coat.
Though minor in your eyes, in the eyes of an interviewer, failure
to take care of the small things suggest a future failure to meet
the demands of real on-the-job problems.
Students complain that dressing for interviews in a suit is “not
me.” Worst yet, some students voice the opinion that they’re
“selling out” when they dress and speak differently (correctly
read: professionally) in interviews.
The truth is you’re not selling out, you’re adapting. If you went to
your 90 year-old grandmother’s birthday party, you’re not likely to
wear cut-off jeans and a shirt that shows off your body piercing.
Likewise, if you go to your best friend’s wedding, you’re likely not
going to wear low ride jeans and flip-flops. If you can adapt for
other occasions, you can adapt for interviews and the office.
Conferences
Conferences are great opportunity for career and personal
advancement. You have the opportunity to network with others in
your field or industry. You can talk to coworkers in a less hurried
atmosphere.
This is one of your best opportunities for networking. Introduce
yourself to others and be sure to ask for business cards. And
don’t be stingy with distributing your business card. If your
employer doesn’t provide them, have your own printed.
Equally important, you have the opportunity to gain new
knowledge and skills. Take notes even if it’s not interesting or
currently relevant to your position. I’ve found that a presentation
at a conference that wasn’t immediately relevant to my work
became helpful later.
There’s loads of free information about the industry, professional
training or resources and new tools for doing business. Service
providers will often use professional conferences to preview new
products they will soon offer. You can be the first in your office
or organization to have information to share about new
technology.
With all the information you’ll be taking with you, do yourself a
favor and mail the information to yourself. Rather than weigh
down your suitcase and wreck havoc with your back, if you have
loads of product samples and booklets, just mail it to yourself.
Most larger hotels have express mail kiosks.
Enjoy yourself. Take advantage of the mixers. Even if you’re an
introvert or don’t drink, try the conference’s social even if it’s just
for a short while. Whatever you do, don’t drink too much.
A coworker was embarrassed to be “sent to his room” at a
conference by his boss because he drank too much during the
social. In his case, he said he had been fasting for Lent and the
alcohol hit his system hard. What an embarrassment
Don’t miss the opportunity to see a new city. That’s one thing I
regret about my first few years of business travel. I was so
worried about sticking to a budget that I wouldn’t splurge and go
sightseeing when on business travel. Many city landmarks have
late hours one day a week, particularly museums. Luckily, many
times these late hours are free or reduced cost.
If you’re drained after a long day at the conference, take a nap
for an hour then go out and explore. On one of my last business
trips for a previous job, I bumped into my boss as I was headed to
the bus stop to hop a bus to go exploring. He was shocked at my
“daring.” For the remainder of the conference, others would ask
me, “Where to tonight?” and before the meeting started I would
let others see the postcards from the places I had seen the night
before.
Once the conference is over, you’ll have a few extra areas to tie
up. First, if you were asked questions or assigned tasks, work on
getting those squared away or putting together a plan of action
together for a long-term task. If you were the only participant
from your office, you’ll need to report back to your supervisor on
any developments or relevant information to your office or
organization. An email will suffice in most cases.
Author Buddy Hobart emphasizes the devil in the details of job
hunting, “The people who are successful at finding good jobs
straight out of college are usually the ones who understand the
importance of the little mail, the right suit, and polished shoes all
play a role in landing the interview and the position. In doing my
survey, I was shocked to see some of the email addresses of
respondents; anything of a sexual nature or even some hobbies
(doll_collctr, sexie_girl, babydoll, me_rudeboy, poopie_babe) as
email addresses can discredit you.
Watch Your Language on Interviews
Slang should never be used during an interview. “All else being
equal—experience, credentials, etc—in most cases the employer
will select the candidate with the better verbal skills,” says Laura
Lorber, managing editor of CareerJournal.com in a Black
Enterprise article.
A former colleague reported being a new hire with one or two
years of experience and interviewing at his alma mater. He
interviewed students whom he had known while he was a student
there. He was surprised that students were far too relaxed with
him during the interview. He didn’t expect them to ingratiate
themselves to him but he expected a more professional
interaction.
Though he wanted to give them a chance, he had a tough time
reconciling their interview behavior to what they would do on the
job. Could he fairly recommend John Doe for a job when John
couldn’t seem to use a word other than “Dude” or “sweet” in the
interview?
From my research, one student admitted to having made the
mistake of following the interviewer’s cue on using vulgarities.
That was a mistake. The interviewer apparently didn’t realize he
was using vulgarities and promptly suggested the student change
his language. Interviewers are critical of your speech and dress
but will give themselves latitude. It can be “do as I say but not as
I do” with vulgarities in interviews AND in the office. That’s a bad
habit to drop quickly!
Interruptions to Interview
If someone interrupts the interview, try to disengage yourself from
the conversation between the person and the interviewer. While
they are talking, avoid eye contact with them by surveying the
interviewer’s bookcase or his awards on the wall. By trying to
maintain eye contact with the interviewer while she’s dealing with
the person who came in may be interpreted as impatience.
What to Consider for an Apartment
Make a mental checklist of things to consider when choosing a
place to stay. You’ll be at a slight disadvantage in that you may
need to learn the pros and cons of a new city and its
neighborhoods (and its suburbs) as well as any quirky issues with
the various neighborhoods of your new city.
Luckily, crime statistics are down for the nation and for most
metropolitan areas. Unfortunately, crime is still very real. When
deciding where to live, you can get a handle on the safety of the
area by doing a few things. First, call the police district for the
area and ask for the crime statistics. Don’t be surprised by a
negative report on crime from the police like “That’s a bad
neighborhood.”
Even the White House is in a “bad neighborhood” using some
statistics. Ask the police for details like the numbers of muggings,
rapes, etc. A neighborhood with a string of car vandalisms isn’t
the same as one with a history of muggings and murders.
Be sure to visit a potential neighborhood at night and during the
day. Are there people standing around for no reason? How is
the street lighting? How clean are the streets compared to other
neighborhoods? Does it look like an area that families or young
adults are living?
You can also gauge a neighborhood by reading the crime reports
in the local paper. Metropolitan areas like Washington, D.C., and
Orlando have crime reports listed weekly in the paper.
Assuming you’ll be living in a city that has public transportation,
one of your selection criteria for a place to live should be public
transportation. If you’re going to drive to work, your residence
doesn’t have to be super close to a train or subway line. You
would probably only use public transportation when your car is in
the shop. If public transportation is to be a daily necessity, the
closer the better. In a city that has a large subway and bus
system, consider housing locations that are close to a line that
runs near your office. Where possible and affordable, shorten
your commute as best possible.
The best location to live is near services such as a grocery store,
drug store, medical facilities, shopping centers, movie theatres,
etc. Here again, give some thought to the what-ifs. If your car is
ever out of commission, closeness to a grocery store or drug
store becomes, using Murphy’s Law, exceedingly important.
Distance to other services like shopping centers and movie
theatres is a consideration; this is a secondary issue and only
comes into play when considering conveniences.
Common Activities for New Employees
As the new kid on the block, you’ll get the least glamorous
assignments and you may get those annual tasks that everyone
dislikes. You also may be asked to do semi-professional jobs
such as editing and proofreading the work of others. These are
all opportunities to shine.
At an old job, I was assigned to do the annual charity campaign
because as my boss put it, “It’s always assigned to the new
person.” It was a matter of getting materials and instructions for
the agency’s campaign coordinator then distributing and
collecting pledge cards. For my office, I had a “kick-off” with
coffee, tea and doughnuts, put up posters and made an email
appeal to staff. Then I did periodic email highlights of the
success stories, taken from the campaign materials that I had
been given. I ended the office’s campaign with a brief program to
present donor pins making finger sandwiches and light snacks.
It cost little out of my pocket to do, made a great impact on a
worthy cause (the office had 100 percent participation and three
recipients of the donor award) and scored some career
enhancing points. Imagine the difference if I had done the task
grudgingly and resentfully at being singled out as the new hire to
do an undesirable task.
As a new employee with a fair amount of free or at least flexible
time, you may be asked to proofread or error check documents
or figures. Proofreading is more important than you think. A typo
or misplaced comma can cost money in a contract dispute or can
cost your employer a valuable client.
If you do proofread, learn common proofreading notations and be
careful with your proofing notes. I once got a document back that
someone had proofread. He used a pencil and small writing. It
was very hard to see his edits; it took extra time to go over his
pages carefully so as not to miss anything.
Also, you may have many manuals to read. Here’s where you
shouldn’t skimp. Read any manuals that you’re given. These will
come in handy very shortly. Your coworkers will know rules and
procedures back and forth. Once you’re at full speed, there will
be no exam on how well you know the rules. You’ll be expected to
work at a high level of competence within the boundaries
established by your employer’s rule book. It may be boring but it
is necessary. Take notes. It helps to stay awake.
Mentors
The Society of Human Resource Management found 25 percent
of employers have formal mentor programs. Such programs are
designed to help new employees blend in and learn the ropes.
However, University of Georgia professor Lillian Eby found that
54 percent of mentees had negative mentoring experiences.
Instead of benefiting their careers, some found the experience
harmful. The reasons were varied but had a common theme; the
mentor often expected the mentee to follow his advice without
exception or the mentor expected the mentee to be a carbon
copy of herself. Occasionally, the relationship sours because of
lack of confidentiality.
Professionals suggest not having mentor in chain of command of
one’s immediate office. Rather seek one or ask to be placed with
one in an office that interests you or had a potential for strategic
alliances. Some career counselors suggest having more than
one mentor, one for each skill area on which you want to develop.
Frankly, though that sounds good, I believe it would be difficult in
practice to find more than one or two mentors.
If the mentor program does not have guidelines for it, be sure to
inquire about confidentiality and frequency of meetings. One
career writer suggested that, if the relationship involved goal
setting, the mentor and mentee should discuss early on
accountability.
Mentors can help with career advice and decoding office politics.
They can also help with making vital connections to others whose
cooperation you may need. They can even provide vital office
“gossip” – informal information about coworkers that is needed to
interact successfully.
Likewise, think about how you approach the mentoring
relationship. As one career writer noted, the mentee tends to
treat the relationship as temporary or ad hoc, going to the mentor
about a particular problem then disappearing. The goal for both
parties should be long term development. However, some mentor
programs like Intel’s have an established duration of a few
months, often six to nine months. The two can continue the
relationship informally.
You should not expect a counseling session or extensive career
advice from mentors. Rather, their role should be one of being a
springboard for you to bounce ideas or to point you in the right
direction. You should also be open for criticism. Above all, know
that your career is not your mentor’s responsibility.
Small Talk
In any social or professional setting, you will need to make small
talk with others. If you don’t know the person, you could easily
struggle though a few awkward minutes. If you ask the wrong
question, your struggle could be even worse.
There are a few things you should never ask people at work.
Never ask when a person plans to start a family. Many people
struggle with infertility privately or their decision to have or not
have children is highly personal. Six million Americans struggle
with infertility. An infertile woman can be highly sensitive to the
topic of children. I almost never ask about children unless I see
pictures in the person’s office.
My favorite interaction advice of etiquette guru Hilda Klinkenberg
is on taboo small talk topics. In the Working Woman article, she
advised against diets, personal health, personal tragedies and
the cost of anything not work related. She also advised against
asking for free professional advice such as asking a
dermatologist to look a mole on your arm. I’d add to that list
smoking; some smokers are extremely sensitive to suggestions to
quit or comments about their health, even in a joking manner.
Never comment to a person about their height or other personal
characteristic. That’s an insult. This includes asking about
scars. Comments like “Did you play basketball?” can grow weary
on a tall person.
Safe topics are the weather, job related developments, local arts
festivals, or major sporting events. Stay away from news events
that could be construed as political or are controversial.
Style Tips for Interviews
The key to dressing for interviews is professionalism and
neutrality. Even if the company has an every day casual dress
policy, the expectation at interviews is business attire. For
women, that generally means suits with skirts and not pants
suits. For both men and women, dark suits in solids or pinstripes
generally are expected for interviews. For professional attire,
navy blue and black are universally stylish and conservative; dark
greys and some green shades are also stunningly professional.
You can add your own personal flares by using accessories
strategically.
Your accessories should be equally neutral and professional.
Interviewers will notice even the smallest detail of a ragged
friendship bracelet, scuffed shoes or wrinkled shirt under a coat.
Though minor in your eyes, in the eyes of an interviewer, failure
to take care of the small things suggest a future failure to meet
the demands of real on-the-job problems.
Students complain that dressing for interviews in a suit is “not
me.” Worst yet, some students voice the opinion that they’re
“selling out” when they dress and speak differently (correctly
read: professionally) in interviews.
The truth is you’re not selling out, you’re adapting. If you went to
your 90 year-old grandmother’s birthday party, you’re not likely to
wear cut-off jeans and a shirt that shows off your body piercing.
Likewise, if you go to your best friend’s wedding, you’re likely not
going to wear low ride jeans and flip-flops. If you can adapt for
other occasions, you can adapt for interviews and the office.
Conferences
Conferences are great opportunity for career and personal
advancement. You have the opportunity to network with others in
your field or industry. You can talk to coworkers in a less hurried
atmosphere.
This is one of your best opportunities for networking. Introduce
yourself to others and be sure to ask for business cards. And
don’t be stingy with distributing your business card. If your
employer doesn’t provide them, have your own printed.
Equally important, you have the opportunity to gain new
knowledge and skills. Take notes even if it’s not interesting or
currently relevant to your position. I’ve found that a presentation
at a conference that wasn’t immediately relevant to my work
became helpful later.
There’s loads of free information about the industry, professional
training or resources and new tools for doing business. Service
providers will often use professional conferences to preview new
products they will soon offer. You can be the first in your office
or organization to have information to share about new
technology.
With all the information you’ll be taking with you, do yourself a
favor and mail the information to yourself. Rather than weigh
down your suitcase and wreck havoc with your back, if you have
loads of product samples and booklets, just mail it to yourself.
Most larger hotels have express mail kiosks.
Enjoy yourself. Take advantage of the mixers. Even if you’re an
introvert or don’t drink, try the conference’s social even if it’s just
for a short while. Whatever you do, don’t drink too much.
A coworker was embarrassed to be “sent to his room” at a
conference by his boss because he drank too much during the
social. In his case, he said he had been fasting for Lent and the
alcohol hit his system hard. What an embarrassment
Don’t miss the opportunity to see a new city. That’s one thing I
regret about my first few years of business travel. I was so
worried about sticking to a budget that I wouldn’t splurge and go
sightseeing when on business travel. Many city landmarks have
late hours one day a week, particularly museums. Luckily, many
times these late hours are free or reduced cost.
If you’re drained after a long day at the conference, take a nap
for an hour then go out and explore. On one of my last business
trips for a previous job, I bumped into my boss as I was headed to
the bus stop to hop a bus to go exploring. He was shocked at my
“daring.” For the remainder of the conference, others would ask
me, “Where to tonight?” and before the meeting started I would
let others see the postcards from the places I had seen the night
before.
Once the conference is over, you’ll have a few extra areas to tie
up. First, if you were asked questions or assigned tasks, work on
getting those squared away or putting together a plan of action
together for a long-term task. If you were the only participant
from your office, you’ll need to report back to your supervisor on
any developments or relevant information to your office or
organization. An email will suffice in most cases.
| Victoria Pilate, Ph.D. |